How To Avoid A Party You Don’t Want To Go To¬†


Here’s the situtation… At my new school I’m “friends” with this bitch. And it was her 17th birthday… I somehow made it onto her invite list to her birthday sleepover. 

I’m a closeted bisexual agender person. Any guesses why an evening with a bunch of girls who are bitchy and judgemental drooling over blokes while most likely very drunk sounds like my idea of hell?

I had to get out of this politely. Quite frankly, I have to much to hide, without including the fact that I can’t be bothered with these people.

So I went on a little trip around Scotland because… Well, why not?

I went up to Yorkshire on the way, past Studley Royal to see the deer and walk my dog. It was nice, but we discovered the hard way not to eat lunch there. It’s a little pricey. 

 A couple of days later, I got to Dundee. I spent a lot of time there by the River Tay, in Dundee town center and at St Andrews beach and the golf course because they have this thing where on Sundays you can walk dogs on certain parts of it. 

After this point, things got interesting. I got to Edinburgh. This was the part we were most worried about because we had the dog with us. And we didn’t know where the hell we were going to walk the dog.

Fortunately it turned out we were just near the observatory and there’s a nature reserve there, which is really nice, dogs are allowed there, I didn’t see any signs about keeping them on the lead. We also took the dog up Arthur’s Seat (I would definitely reccomend this, but wear walking boots, the paths aren’t great.) Dogs are allowed off the lead there as well and my 13 year old dog managed it fine. It took us about an hour and a half for the round trip to the top and back.

While I was in Edinburgh we went to Princes Street Gardens (without dog), spent a lot of time just chilling out there, and me and my brother went to see the new Kingsman film (because that’s what you do when you’re travelling around). I would definitely reccomend watching that. 

I then got back 2 days before the party. I knew I wasn’t actually going to miss the party, but I’d hoped I’d miss it by less. Fortunately, taking excess photos, avoiding my local towns and avoiding the internet means I think I got away with it.

And that is how you avoid a party with people you hate. You are welcome.

I hope you found this post interesting/ entertaining. If you did, please like it or leave a comment. Follow me if you want to see more of what I have to say. My Instagram is @awkwardhumanblog and all of my photos are there..

AwkwardHuman xx


Mitsis Summer Palace (Kos, Greece) Review


If you read my last post, you’ll know that I went to Kos. You heard all about the earthquake but nothing about where I stayed, so now I’m gone I figured I may as well talk about that.

So I stayed at the Mitsis Summer Palace hotel, it’s all inclusive and I think it’s one of three or four Mitsis hotels in one complex.

Not my photo (sorry)

We got there fairly late on Tuesday night, they checked us in really fast and took us to the room, which was really clean, the air conditioning worked (which is always a bonus in a hot country) and it was large enough for the four of us in there. I’d say my only criticism is that our bathroom didn’t lock, but it’s not the end of the world.

Because we arrived pretty late, we had missed dinner. We assumed we would just have to hang on until breakfast, but we were pleasantly surprised to find they had left food in the room for us.

The food in the main restaurant was really good, it was just one of the buffet situations. There was a wide range of choices at all meals and even if you weren’t keen on certain foods, you weren’t going to be hungry. All the waiters were really friendly and helpful especially after the earthquake, checking everyone was alright.

My Mum was really concerned when we booked the hotel because they have an animation team, we went to a hotel with one before and they were really in your face and loud, but here they weren’t too in your face or loud and they were also really friendly. Also, if you had that much of a problem with them, they were fairly easy to avoid, they tended to be on the beach until around lunch time, then they disappeared until around 3 then reappeared for a couple of hours.

There was also a number of day trips offered. These do cost extra and we planned to go on a couple of them, but my parents kept forgetting to talk to the people about it so it didn’t happen.

The beach was relatively clean and there was a really good water sports station, where you can do things like bannana boats and ringo but this is at an extra cost . There was also a guy who came around with drinks and watermelon if you couldn’t even be bothered to walk to the bar there. The pools were also quite clean, although all except one of them are salt water, which isn’t an issue, but next time I jump into a pool without my eyes covered, a little warning would be nice.

There was also an Italian and a Greek restaurant, included in the all inclusiveness, but you do need to book. We went to both of them and the food there was even better than the main restaurant.

In terms of entertainment, they had the childrens disco every evening at the stage under the main bar, however for the main entertainment this took place in the Norida Beach part, this is still run by Mitsis so you can go there, but it’s a couple of minutes walk. During the day there was also a number of activities.

Overall, this hotel was amazing, the staff were friendly and helpful, the place was clean, the food was good. Would I go back? No. I don’t think there’s time to go to the same place twice, plus also it just isn’t the same because it isn’t the same people. However I would definitely reccomend it to anyone and I would use a Mitsis hotel again.

I hope you found this interesting, especially if you plan on travelling to Greece/ surrounding area. Please give this post a like if you enjoyed it and follow me if you want to see more of what I have to say. Also, feel free to follow my socials, which are linked at the top.

AwkwardHuman xx

My Brother Slept Through An Earthquake


If you follow my twitter or Instagram, you would be aware I’m in Kos… There was also an earthquake there very early on Friday morning. The largest one in the area for around 85 years or something. I was there for it, because I’m that kind of lucky person.

I’ve never been in an earthquake before this point. I wasn’t at the epicentre but even at my hotel the room was shaking like crazy. Fortunately it is well designed and modern enough that no serious damage was done and no one was injured.

But that doesn’t mean that no one was scared. Of all the stuff I’ve done, I’d say this is the point I have been most seriously concerned about if I would actually survive.

I don’t know if I was awake before it, or if it woke me up but the first thing I remember was everything shaking dramatically for what felt like ages, but was probably not much longer than 30 seconds. It stopped for probably a minute or 2, then happened again. For the next maybe half hour or hour there was a number of much smaller 3 secondish aftershocks.

When I woke up properly (when I say wake up, I mean gave up trying to sleep) I found out that my brother literally slept through the entire thing and didn’t believe us until he saw it on the news. Where we were, at an estimate we think the main 2 earthquakes we felt were no bigger than a 4. But still, it was loud and pretty dramatic.

It became more dramatic when we hears running water. The shaking caused the pools water to slosh around and its contents were running down the stairs in an ankle high river.

I wrote this post on Sunday 23July and its only today that there were no aftershocks, but on both Friday and Saturday evening there were small ones while we had dinner.

Some people’s reactions was pretty ridiculous. They survived the big one. But they scream, run out of the room (further into the building, which is kind of dumb) and abandon their meals. I think those two evenings are the emptiest I’ve seen the dining room.

In all seriousness, I’m glad no one in my resort was hurt, the casualty and number of deaths was relatively low, although some were still injured or killed, my thoughts go out to them and their families. The staff at the resort were amazing. 

Please give this post a like if you found it interesting, maybe leave a comment on any of your own experiences. If you want to see more of what I have to say please feel free to follow me. If you are not on the WordPress reader my socials should be linked at the top.

 AwkwardHuman xx

I Got Stuck In A Train Door


Whatever, I live in the UK, I am from the UK, this post about my trip to London has been classed as travel. I don’t care. I live in the middle of nowhere, a trip to a city may as well be a foreign country.

Anyway, so I went to London with my dad as a kind of reward for the work I did for my exams, especially as my parents felt bad about going on holiday without me in February. 

So we went to the National Gallery because neither of us had been there before and we felt that the rest of our family saw us as pretty damn ignorant for not going to it before. Neither of us are the kind of people who would be able to go round the entire gallery with audio guides without wanting to jump off a tall building, but you don’t really need them as each painting has a little bit of crap about them on the side, so really if you understand English, you probably don’t need an audio guide unless you want to know everything about a piece.

Then we walked to the Aquarium via Snog’s bus that sells frozen yoghurt. I bought a mango one with Raspberry’s and ended up eating on the top floor of the bus, which they have turned into a seating area, it was a pretty good bus. 

We got to the aquarium and my dad was there with pretty low expectations of “it’s just going to be a couple of fish in a tank”. The whole way they did the aquarium was amazing. I loved the way that you had no idea where you were going then every so often you’d end up back at another point of a massive tank. Can I just add that it’s really nice that they actually bother to clean the glass as well, so you can actually see inside the tank. I’d definitely reccomend a trip there.

We had a couple of hours to kill so we walked to the Tate Modern and had a look around there. There’s always some interesting exhibits in there and this visit was no exception.

Then there was the tube problems. We walked to the nearest tube station which we then found was closed. We had to walk to the next nearest one which meant the journey was going to be a lot longer as we couldn’t get a direct train. As we approached the train, the doors started their alarm to say they were going to close, my dad got on, I followed. 

I got stuck in the door as it closed. 

My dad, being the amazing observant parent, failed to notice me, so the other passengers had to force them open to let me through. I now have some lovely bruises on my arms and legs from the doors, I’m not joking, those things are designed to close. When my dad eventually realised I had been stuck in the door, all he could do was laugh (thanks a bunch).

We got to Victoria tube station and had about an hour until Wicked was set to begin, so we got some food.

We got to Wicked at just the right time, there was a scary long queue outside, but as it was for bag checks it didn’t take too long. The show itself was amazing as well as the effects being really good. It was also really nice at the end to see staff holding buckets to raise money for Stonewall.

Overall it was an amazing weekend, it was also really nice to see various things to do with Pride all around London. 

 Not my photo.

If you enjoyed this post, please give it a like. If you want to see more of what I have to say please follow me. My socials are also at the top it you are on the web browser version.

AwkwardHuman xx

Summer Camp 2016


I am now on camp, so, like last week I will be doing my run through of exactly what happened and when.

Saturday 16th July 09:15

I didn’t get time to update anything last high, but we arrived at just after 7pm and put my stuff in the tent. I am sharing with 2 other girls. One I know and this is the first time I have met the other. The one I know is alright and the other, while being nice is quite childish. We had dinner at 7:30 then we did some games, we played Cops and Robbers, football and rounders. Then we finished off with a game of ‘hide and seek’ (only one person hides). Afterwards we had a talk then we went for a walk on the beach. Once we got in we just went to sleep. When I woke up this morning, it was 6:30 and I had a very stiff back because I haven’t been on a roll mat for so long. We had breakfast just before 8:30 after the longest game of catch in history. 


We had a talk and then we did some team games. We played volleyball and then we mucked around with a pair of slingshots (which was really fun) and then we had lunch. After lunch we had another talk and then we shut our tents and went for a walk over to the boating lake. We rowed for an hour then we had ice cream and walked back. 


For fucks sake, the other girls in my tent keep leaving the fly net open. YOU WONDER WHY INSECTS ARE BITING YOU, MAYBE IF YOU CLOSED THE FUCKING NET YOU WOULDN’T GET BITTEN. Jesus.

Sunday 17th July 07:17

Last night we had dinner, gathered firewood and then we had a talk. Afterwards we played some wide games. We played some game that was a bit like netball (except the court was split in half and instead of getting the ball in the net you had to hit the post from the area outside- you weren’t allowed in a certain zone near the net). We also played cops and robbers due to demand of irritating little kids. Next we went down onto the beach and had a fire. We ate hotdogs and had hot chocolate and marshmallows. Once we got back it was midnight so we had to go to bed. I woke up this morning and my back is peeling everywhere (thanks Axwell T-shirt on Vesuvius.)

Some later point 

I didn’t get to finish the post when it happened but that morning we had breakfast and a talk then we had water games. We played volleyball with water balloons and sheets as well as going on a giant water slide (also known as a sheet on the ground). Once we were dry we had lunch and another talk. After this we packed and cleared our tents. We went onto the beach then litter picked the campsite. We then went home and got lost due to idiots distracting our driver. 

That was my weekend on camp and I was absolutely exhausted and slept for ages on Sunday night.

Love,  AkwardHuman xx



At the moment, I am currently in Italy. So in the way I usually do, here is my full account of what happened.

Monday 11th July 16:55

I got up at 1am and arrived at school at 2am. One other the other schools we are here with were there already. Eventually the other school showed up and we got on the bus to the airport. We checked in and then we went through security which was quite traumatic for me  because they randomly pulled me aside and searched me. Fun. When we got to the departures lounge I wasn’t feeling great, so thinking I it was because I hadn’t eaten, I ate some breakfast. It didn’t help but it didn’t make things worse. We got on the plane and I started to feel really bad. I put on some music and tried to sleep to take my mind off it. When we landed and got off the plane I felt slightly better but still not great. We got our bags then drove to the hotel in Sorrento. We are staying in a hotel called Hotel Il Faro. The people at the hotel weren’t very helpful and we got moved around 3 times when we tried to eat lunch, its also quite grotty. I still wasn’t feeling great so I didn’t eat much. We then tried to sort out our rooms and the girls were all a nightmare. Loads wanted to swap. In the end my teacher just said no swapping. The ones I’ve ended up with are OK, but I don’t think I can put up with them for any longer than I have to- there’s a bit of a personality clash. We then went for a walk in Sorrento and I am currently outside the La Villa bar. They do very good slush and the views are amazing. I did go for a little walk in the town but not very long because it is still really hot and I am so tired, and not feeling 100% still. 


We’re back at the grotty hotel room with one plug socket between 5 of us. We went down to the beach and had a paddle (we aren’t allowed to swim because we don’t have a lifeguard.) I sort of want to go home, I want to enjoy myself but I just can’t, I feel I’ll, the hotel room is unpleasant and my poor dog is sat at home with my brother looking after her.

Tuesday 12th July 08:00

Last night we had dinner which was a 3 course meal but I couldn’t even finish the starter which is really unlike me. It was really good food but I’m just not hungry. We went to bed early and I got up at half 6 to have a shower. I’m still quite tired even though I have had a long sleep and I still can’t eat much because I’m just not hungry. I’m currently sitting in the hotel room waiting to go to Mount Vesuvius and Pompeii. 


We got on the bus and went to Mount Vesuvius, we went up the tourist route and had a tour at the top. I would reccomend wearing trainers or walking boots here because it is quite steep with very loose earth. We then got on the bus to Pompeii and I managed to eat some lunch. We arrived there and the entrance we wanted to use was closed because Elton John is performing there tonight so they were busy setting up. This meant we couldn’t see the bit with all the bodies however the rest of it was still pretty amazing. We then managed to loose 10 students so I am sat on the bus waiting for our teachers to find them.


We found the missing students and went back go the hotel for dinner. I managed to actually eat some and I am feeling a bit better. I’m tired so I’m going to sleep.

Wednesday 13th July 08:22

Had a shower and had some breakfast. Couldn’t eat anything again and not feeling great. Waiting to go to Capri. Also turns out I got very burnt yesterday when I was wearing my Axwell T-shirt (it has a pretty low back).


We walked down to the port and took some photos while we waited for the boat to Capri. It was a fairly shortish ride over there and I took some good photos. We arrived in Capri and it is very pretty. We got on the train to the top and we have now been released on the town. I bought a chocolate chip ice cream for myself which was so good and a magnet for my parents. I am now halfway through a bucket of lemon slush (lemons are kind of a big deal around here, I don’t actually know why.)


One of the other girls in my group arrived shortly after the last update announcing she needed a swimming costume so she quickly bought one them she and J both bought ice cream. J’s one exploded when she held it, fortunately someone else caught it then we had the entertaining thing of washing her hands in the street with a water bottle. Afterwards we went to Bar Tiberio and had a pizza. The staff were very good and catered for our awkward order (we went halfs because I couldn’t manage a whole pizza) and we had very fast service.


We got back on the train then the boat and went down to the beach. We weren’t allowed in the sea any further than knee deep but one of the teachers started a water fight. I didn’t take part since I was wearing my really nice brand new Zedd True Colours T-Shirt but everyone else had fun. I am now sat in my hotel room and packing because we are leaving very early tomorrow morning. 


We had dinner which was quite entertaining because I found myself on at table with a group of year 8 boys, so maturity was very low (not complaining). I then went back to the hotel room to pack what else can currently be packed and I think I am on the other girls’s gaydars… Slight problem, I’m not even ready for people who do know me to know about me, let alone people I’ve known a week.

Thursday 14th July 06:30

We some up to find we had company- there was an infestation of ants in our hotel room which was disgusting. We got dressed and washed as quickly as possible and then walked to the bus.


We got to the airport and checked in our bags. I managed to get through security without any issues this time and I am now sat in the departure lounge waiting to go.


My flight was delayed by one hour. Which meant an extra hour in the departure lounge, not ideal but it wasn’t awful. The WiFi was better than the hotel and there was places to charge your phones so we sat on sofas eating ‘breakfast’ (sweets and Pringles) catching up on what’s been happening in the UK.


Shit happened. We landed and one of the sets of mechanical steps broke so we couldn’t get off the plane. Then one of the kids on our trip had a panic attack because his ears popped and he couldn’t hear anything… Great. So we got held back 10 minutes there. Then as a result we ended up getting to border control at the worst point so we were queuing there for ages. By the time I had got through, I had already been in the UK for an hour. We then had to get our bags then we ended up sitting by the bus waiting for is kid to reappear (apparently they had to get an ambulance. People, this is where your taxes are going- there was nothing wrong with him, he is always having panic attacks.) This took another hour. Great! So we are finally on the bus going home.

In all fairness, this trip has been great despite a couple  of low points and heat sickness (and a horrible burn on my back). It was a great experience and I would love to go to Italy again. I will try to upload some photos as soon as possible because I took loads on my camera.

Love, AkwardHuman xx

London Weekend


This weekend, I am going to London. I’m going to do this post in the same way I did My weekend away back in July.

31st December 9:43 am
I’ve just finished packing so I now have a 2 hour wait. I don’t actually particularly want to go to London. Going to see the fireworks sounds like a big anticlimax- you stand for hours for a 15 minute display, everyone is drunk, it’s cold out there and YOU PROBABLY GET A BETTER VIEW ON TV. Just saying.

6:54 pm
I’m in London now. We’re still having the debate wether to actually go to the fireworks or not, it’s raining. I realised I left my waterproof trousers at home. Well they are filthy anyway, may be for the better but still… I can’t be bothered with this whole trip, I dislike city centres, especially London because they are so crowded. As a person from an area of the UK that’s pretty quiet and who is socially awkward, I struggle with being around large amounts of people.

1st January 2016 8:00am
Last night, we didn’t have tickets so we went on the internet (yeah, that crazy invention) and saw that Greenwich park was a good place. It stopped raining. When we got there, all the gates were shut, so instead we walked around to find another gate open, we didn’t. We followed the edge of the park until we found a large group of people on top of Crooms Hill. The view was pretty good, it was far enough away that you could see but not hear the fireworks. There was probably only around 200/300 of us there, so it wasn’t to busy. A couple of people also bought their own fireworks and were setting them off. Plus, because it wasn’t the main event, we didn’t have the nightmare of getting public transport home.

Not my photo

2nd January
Today I’m finally going home! Yesterday was pretty bad. I was made to wear a dress. Ghastly. Firstly we went to the Tate Modern, by river taxi which was really cool and my new favourite way of getting around London. The Tate it’s self was also really cool, especially since I take Art GCSE . Then we went to the Lord Mayors parade where unfortunately we couldn’t see much but there was stuff on the big screen.  Then, my aunt booked theatre tickets to The Fireworkmakers Daughter which was an Opera (please imagine me shooting myself). I can’t stand Opera’s because you can’t understand what’s happening. Fortunately, I was next to my brother, which meant I could make an agreement where I’d keep him awake if he kept me awake, and I could say what I wanted. Then we had to go for dinner with my aunt, which meant 2 hours of pretending we enjoyed ourselves. The night before, we had all joked she would book a vegetarian place. She did. I didn’t understand what half the stuff on the menu was, so in the end I played it safe with a korma (which was missing chicken) and pilau rice. My brother, always trying to be polite by being adventerous (idiot) orderded a disgusting pancake and was struggling to finish it. Still, I have been promised a burger tonight (thank God).

So that’s my trip to London. Happy new year to everyone! Try to stick to your resolutions, I’ll try to stick to mine…

Love, AkwardHuman xx

Scotland Holiday


Note: I wrote this the morning before this actually got uploaded

So alot has happened…

On Saturday I went to literally the best ice cream parlour. It’s called Fochabers Ice Cream parlour. I would highly reccomend a visit if you are ever in the Moray area. Or if you’re not, pay a visit anyway. All of the ice cream is home made and it is soo delicous and they have multiple awards.

On Sunday we moved sights. I don’t actually know exactly where we are, but we are somewhere on the west-coast. I can tell you exactly where I am staying when I leave. I also discovered that the wifi is awfull here and I am better off using my data on my phone. Not ideal

On Monday we walked my dog on the beach then we were shown around the area. It is so different to where I live. I have visited 3 towns near here and there are bearly any of the usual high street brands (I have no issues but it is a bit odd).

Yesterday we continued our tour of the local area and we went to see some Red Kites (the birds). I was quite annoyed because it was raining alot so I couldn’t use my camera. We also booked the rest of this weeks activities.

Apparently today we are going to another ice cream parlour and we are going for a tour of the farm. This evening we are going to see some fireworks (some local Gala Week??? Whatever that is, that’s what it said on the leaflet).

So excited because tomorrow I get to go horse riding! I have an hour long hack booked so it should be a more fun and interesting way for me to see the countryside. Then in the evening I get to be stuck on a boat for 3 hours fishing… Great. I. Hate. Fish. So that will be interesting…

On Friday I get to go on, I think it’s the UK’s longest zip wire. Which is going to be so awesome! Then I get to do water zorbing. Basically the put 20 gallons of water in a ball then you get in the ball and they roll you down a hill. I call it the hamster ball experience.

Not sure what is happening after that.

AkwardHuman xx

Sneaky Midnight Update


Why I am blogging at midnight, I do not know but anyway… If this makes no sense, that’s why.

A lot has happened. Yesterday we went on a boat. We saw loads of seals, but no dolphins (apparently they are in the sea here). It was really bumpy and we got soaked because they water was choppy and at some points we weren’t exactly going slow.

Today, we climbed a mountain. When I say a I actually should say 4. My dad said we would climb a mountain, but he took us a long way round because he was worried about my mum and gran. So my legs are quite stiff, the mountains were steep. And cold.


I got in just before the release video of Joe Sugg’s book cover. I love it! Not long after that I got a text from C saying she bought tickets to see him on stage and get a signed copy of the book.

I think that’s it…

AkwardHuman xx

Random Post About Scotland


We made it! It’s FINALLY the summer holidays!

I am currently in the place where I first discovered the happy land of youtube. It’s this really really nice house in Scotland- why I was saying I was in Scotland and moaning about Scottish weather on my twitter (@akwardhumanblog).

I’m terrible with self promo..

Anyway, so yesterday we went on a walk on the beach then we went to pick up my grandma. Me and my dad also made macaroni cheese pies (apparently they are a really scottish thing. Anything in pie is really scottish. Just like in England we put everything in pastry). I might make a post with the recipe…

Moving on from pies… Today, we dragged gran out for a 3 or 4 hour walk. Lets say she wasn’t to impressed.

I have really been enjoying the really good wifi here, let’s say sleeping hasn’t been an option. Well, it was but sleep or youtube. No brainer. Youtube.

This has also been a good oppurtunity to get away from some of the haters. Most of them are unaware left so by the time I get home and back to school the instagram hate thing should have blown over. Hopefully.

Apparently tomorrow we are going on a boat trip to see some seals etc tomorrow. Unfortunately I can’t uplpoad any photos until I get home because I don’t have a laptop with me to upload photos onto. And I hate taking photos on my phone.

Sorry! So no photos for 2 weeks but then there will be loads (hopefully. If I don’t fill up my memory).

I’m rambling…

AkwardHuman xx